Monday, September 17, 2007

Pretty Lady Needs No More Vacation

She has had Plenty. And it has been splendid; the up-close tickets for 'Wicked,' the strolls in the Botanical Garden, the fancy Birthday Party, the trip Up North for the annual Apple Fling. Splendid. Excellently so.

And now Pretty Lady is home, and the bills are overdue, and the landlord cashed the rent check and forgot to write it down, so she has to go through all her bank statements to prove she paid it, and she is facing suspension at the food co-op, and her clients have probably found other bodyworkers by now, and she cannot get into the closet, and the front door lock needs either a locksmith or a good dose of WD-40, and Pretty Lady is so stressed out that she just read every letter to the editor at Salon instead of getting down to work.

Enough vacation is enough. Please kick Pretty Lady in the behind.


Chris Rywalt said...

Don't use oil on a lock! Argh! Use graphite! You should have some of that around, being an artist and all.

Anonymous said...

Consider your behind kicked. And you're welcome.

Anonymous said...

Arrgh! I know! And on top of all that, having someone offer to pitch your work, unasked, to galleries in their home town - nightmare! It reminds me of when people would say, "oh, you're artist - you should show at my friend's cafe!" You don't want to be rude when they're trying to be kind and helpful, but ...


The Aardvark said...

You can send me some of that vaca--whateveritis.

Now get to work.

And our local plumbers and electricians would make it clear that WD-40 is best used as a liniment.

I kid you not. Personally I think it's sympathetic magic.

Anonymous said...

One year the National Forensics Tournament was won, in the Informative Speaking category, by a kid from my school who ennumerated the many uses of WD-40, and liniment was among them. Personally, I prefer the smell of my Tiger Balm.